Hermione Jane Granger

Draco,

We might be a few days working on things for the potion. Maybe longer, so it means you'd be going to Moddey alone to see Ragnik on Thursday. I mean, I might be able to go with you but probably not, I'd plan on going alone if I were you. All right? We've still got time and we're not even going to get the other goblins to help before Mrs Longbottom and Remus have their argument-thing with them.

Oh, meanwhile, though, I left a book for you on the landing. It's about lock-picking. Just in case they say no, even after Remus and Mrs Longbottom make the case.

Mr Lupin, I saw what you wrote to Mrs Longbottom.

This is one of those times where we're supposed to be happy for people but it's not really all that simple, is it?

I mean, if it makes Terry happy then that's a good thing, I guess. And if it makes the Longbottoms happy then there's no harm in it, surely.

So why do I feel...not happy? I don't know what else to call it. I'm not cross; I'm not upset by it (though...is Sirius a little upset? He seemed a bit, I dunno, false when we were talking about it over breakfast--like he's trying to convince himself that he's happy for them?); anyway, I'm not upset; I'm not jealous or anything like that. (But I wonder if any of the other Moddey children are? I wouldn't be surprised, and I wouldn't blame them if they were.)

I suppose I'm a little puzzled, and a bit...I don't know. I think it's clear that Terry's trying to find a sense of belonging. I mean, that's why he left Moddey for Sherwood, and that's why he's joined the Zulu companies. That's probably why he's doing this, too. And I'm glad that the Longbottoms are so willing to call him one of their own, but I have a feeling that this isn't going to fulfill him any better than anything else.

And I guess that makes me feel really sorry for him. And hate that Carrow did that to him, but that doesn't help, Carrow's dead and the damage was done long before he died, anyway. I guess I just wish Terry didn't need so badly. It makes me wonder if he'll ever really, really be happy, because he keeps looking for his happiness outside of himself.

I'm not sure how to do this, so I wondered if you could help.

Have either of you talked to Tim Clark before? Remember, he's one of the muggleborns who escaped at the Quidditch World Cup and now he lives at Sherwood with Sarah and Terry and Dudley and the others. Only I suppose not Terry soon, if he's going to go off with a Zulu company. Anyway, he's quite nice and really very fit, at least I think so, and he was at the Order meeting Saturday because he used to live at Moddey before he moved out to Sherwood and I talked with him there a bit, and I don't know if you noticed but we talked on Saturday too and then he wrote to me yesterday because he said he went straight to Mrs L to ask to be sworn in to the Order and then he wrote to me to tell me he'd done that specifically so that he could write to me and--and I think he fancies me and I think I just might fancy him back but I'm not sure because I've never really fancied anyone who was actually someone I ever could fancy, I mean not really, and I don't want Draco or Terry getting upset about it and how do you do this?

I mean, I want to write back to him but they'll see the message header. And with the way things are with Draco right now, I mean, he's really leaning on me a lot and I know he'll improve and it's not that I don't want to be supportive, I really do, I want to stick with him and we've even got a plan and we've talked to Sirius and he thinks it will be a good thing to do, and very helpful, so I'm really happy we have that to work on, but I don't want to upset him right now or make him think I'm going to abandon him. And Harry, I know you're spending loads of time with him, Hydra, but I could see how lonely he looked at the Order meeting on Saturday and I want to make sure he knows I still care about him.

Only. With Tim it's different. I mean, we don't really have a history together. And yes, he's a muggleborn but it's not as if that's the only thing we have in common, either.

Did I mention he's really quite fit?



Oh, bollocks. It'll never work, will it? I mean, he shares a tent with Dudley and Finbar and he's mates with Terry and I just don't think I can hurt Terry like that. Not right now, certainly. I mean, it would be different if it weren't someone he knows well, like that. Wouldn't it?

How do you lot ever manage to date different people at school? It's hopelessly complicated. I think I was better off not ever thinking about anyone like that. Maybe I'll just tell him we can only write to one another if we're just going to be mates, nothing else.

Pansy, if you're ready, we could use you.

Madam Pomfrey, Mr Snape looked at Caradoc. It wasn't the spell he thought it was, causing the bleeding, I mean, but he tried his counterspell anyway and it looks like it worked. At any rate, the bleeding has stopped and the wounds are closing on their own. So that's good. But Caradoc still looks awfully pale.

Oh, and Sirius is awake.

He's quite, er, upset that he's at Moddey. And he's got a tremor in his right arm, so he can't really hold a quill. Or a wand. Mr Lupin's helping him to eat something.

Mr Snape also saw the spasms and he said that he thinks he knows what the curse was and it gave him an idea for another potion to help.

(Oh, he told me not to tell anyone that. So don't tell him I said anything. But I didn't want you to worry or go to the trouble of making a potion if he's already going to make one.)



Mr Longbottom's still unconscious.