alt_hermione | Order Only: Hydra and Auror Lestrange

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Order Only: Hydra and Auror Lestrange

Hydra just came and asked me to follow her wearing Harry's cloak. She said Elise Urquhart came into the common room just now and told her that her mother's here to speak to her and she needed to come with her, and Hydra said she asked if she could put her books in her dormitory and Elsie said yes but to be quick about it, but instead she came and found me and asked me to go get Harry's cloak right away and to catch up as quickly as ever I could.

So that's what I'm doing. I'm sure it's to do with what happened on the 1^st, with Justin and all.

I'll keep everyone posted.

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Hermione, you should come back. I'll take the cloak. Why does someone need to be there with the cloak, anyway? Hydra doesn't think her mother's going to kill her, surely, right here in the castle?

She should have found me or Harry instead. Bellatrix is a legilimens, she needn't see you to figure out that you're there.

Draco,

Auror Lestrange might wish to speak to you, or Harry. Or me.

We'd best stand by in case we're summoned.

Dash it.

-Justin

"Dash it?"

You know, after this all blows over - and I sincerely hope that it does, with minimal damage - you ought to start investigating the source of your obvious death wish.

NO KIDDING. I think the Hat put him in the wrong House.

This is massively frustrating. Hydra grew up with an extremely strong sense of self-preservation because she had to, and he's compromised that, again and again. I realise she's responsible for her own choices, but he hasn't exactly been a good influence, either.

And now she's gone and dragged Hermione into it, for reasons I can't quite fathom.

Why do you reckon it's taking so long? Doesn't it seem like they've been gone for ages?

They haven't. If you take into account the time it takes for someone to walk across the castle it's been barely any time at all, it just seems like it's been ages.

Yeah, it does.

The thing about Hydra and Justin -- yes, she takes more risks. A lot more risks.

But would you turn her back into the girl who thought one of Hermione's parents must have been a pig?

When someone changes the way Hydra did, and Pansy, and you -- everything gets more risky. There's just no way around it. (Though, that doesn't mean you're required to sneak out every night to snog in your specially-equipped secret stairwell when you know someone's father is itching to cast AK on anyone who despoils his innocent little girl. That's just stupidity. On both their parts.)

I mean on one hand I like Hydra and Justin quite a bit and on the other I would quite like to hex both of them for being so stupid. It's not like they did something worthwhile and noble and risky and got caught. They weren't rescuing babies or passing out banned books or freeing muggleborns. THEY WERE SNOGGING.

Ron and I sneak out sometimes. But not much lately, because Ron can't do it safely. And if we got caught and Slughorn wrote to our parents, I'd probably get a Howler from Mrs Stretton to amuse everyone at breakfast and Ron would get a letter from Mrs Weasley scolding him and telling him to be more careful and we'd both serve a detention and that would be the end of it. It's a very different sort of risk.

Let's be honest, they were doing more than snogging. They were neck-deep in a fantasy about getting married and having babies. Hydra's been wearing an engagement ring. And that's what was most risky of all, indulging in some sort of escapist dream of having a normal, happy life instead of accepting the devastating reality that he's a secret mudblood, and she's the daughter of Voldemort's right-hand woman.

If they'd stuck with the terms Hydra's father dictated, or at least done a better job pretending, he was going to back the idea of them getting married. I don't think it was THAT crazy. The thing about being a secret muggleborn is that people don't know, right?

Bellatrix is hung up on Hydra marrying Harry but it's never been clear to me how she thinks she's going to get Harry to go along with that. He treats her like a little sister. Well, he's a little nicer to her than Ron is to Ginny but other than that, they really do act like siblings.

Anyway. You're right that a normal life is a fantasy. For any of us. Look at the Order adults, and how things are working out for them. The ones in the most danger are the ones trying to maintain the facade of a normal life, I'd say.

Mm, yes, but Hydra's father also gave her an impossible task - convincing Bellatrix that marrying Justin was a good idea. I can't imagine any circumstances where she would have agreed to that. I'm sure in her mind, Hydra will either marry Harry or no one at all.

I wonder if Hydra knew, deep down, that there was no way she could ever convince her mother to approve the pairing. Even suggesting Justin as a partner would have put him at risk. Bellatrix would have probed further, and might've even discovered that his blood-line had been fabricated. That would explain why Hydra took such risks - because she knows, at least on an unconscious level, that she can never really have what she wants. None of us will. Not until he's gone. Better to accept that now than cosying up to soothing delusions.

Hydra's got years left of school. Maybe she was hoping that in the meantime, her mother would drop dead from a sudden attack of annoying Voldemort at the wrong moment. (Unlikely, but it's a not-uncommon cause of death for Councilwizards.)

But. Yes.

You could have had a normal life with Pansy, or as close to it as anyone gets in the Order. You could have a normal life with Daphne -- we'd have to tell her, but you know we could (I know, I know, you don't feel that way about each other or you'd be snogging each other by now.)

Do you want a normal life? ~~I mean --~~

We snog sometimes. I mean, not usually on a whim ~~except~~. But Daphs understands roles and acting, and she knows that there's a role I've got to play - it's the role of who I would have been, had I grown up to be the Draco Malfoy my parents planned on. That Draco Malfoy would be dating someone like Daphne Greengrass. He could date Pansy if she grew up to be the Pansy she was meant to be, before Regulus messed her up, but Pansy's too different now, and she's not a very good actress, most of the time.

The real Draco Malfoy - the one that you know (but who has to pretend not to exist too much, lest it threaten the masquerade of the other Draco Malfoy) - he.. I mean I, I can't ever have the 'normal life' I really want... can't now, anyway. Maybe not ever. So why even dream about it? It will just muck things up.

I wouldn't tell Daphne about all of this - the Order, the full extent my plans, and so forth - unless I did for some reason decide I wanted a life with her someday.

But I don't see that happening.

Do you think you could have the normal life you wanted if things changed? If they changed a lot, if we -- I mean, if the Order and their baby army managed to take down Voldemort and change everything.

I mean, it could happen. Sometimes when I can't sleep I tell myself I believe it's going to happen, that it'll happen when we're still young enough that we'll really get to live in that other society, and I imagine my life in it. Do you not do that? I don't know if Pansy does, or not.

You're right that she's not a very good actress.

A normal life? I don't know.

The Protectorate changed our way of life very quickly, so logically speaking, it isn't impossible to think that it could change back quickly, too. The paradigm shift hasn't really happened yet - not while so many are still living who remember the way things were before. So yes, sometime I think about that, especially when things seem very hopeless.

I try not to imagine my life, specifically, in that context, because it would distract me.

I suppose it is distracting.

But, it makes me feel hopeful, too. It's not just my own life, I imagine Justin and Hydra being married. Mrs Longbottom in charge of MLE instead of Bellatrix. Hermione teaching at Hogwarts. Things like that.

I mean it's a little silly, I don't know if Hermione would be any good at teaching. Or if she wants to be a teacher. Anything like that.

She'd be a good teacher, but I think she'd be doing even more than that.

I see that you don't quite know how to imagine me in your Utopian future. Don't worry, though - neither do I.

No, I do imagine you, it's just that ~~I was afraid you'd make fun~~ it seemed a little, I don't know.

I imagine you being, I don't quite know what to call it, the person who shows the other purebloods that it's going to be better for them, too. Someone in the middle, who was supposed to be at the top of the old regime so people will believe you when you say, 'this will be worth it.' When I imagine us all years in the future sometimes I imagine you as Minister -- only, you know, one who's actually running things and isn't just Voldemort's scapegoat when things go wrong.

I tried picturing Hermione as Minister just now but honestly she's SUCH A GRYFFINDOR. Politics are one thing I'm not sure she'll ever be all that good at. She'd be a brilliant Headmistress at Hogwarts, though.

I can't say that particular scenario ever occurred to me, but I suppose it might work. Convincing other purebloods, I mean - I'm not sure about being Minister. Someone more likeable should be Minister, and I'll just feed him or her all the best ideas.

Too right she's a gryffindor. She just now rubbished me for being worried about her - as if it's completely ordinary to go sneak around Bellatrix under an invisibility cloak. If she'd been caught, she'd not just have been in trouble for spying, but also for stealing her Master's property. Which meant she would have been sent back to the camps, at best, or just killed right on the spot by Bellatrix.

Probably killed on the spot, unless the Headmistress -- well. Nothing good would have come of it.

Who would you have sent instead? Really, anyone caught spying on Bellatrix would have been in deep trouble. I'd have gone too, though, if Hydra had asked me. Not because I'm a Gryffindor, just because I wouldn't have thought about how dangerous it was until it was too late to back out.

I would have sent myself, I suppose. Or Harry. He can't occlude very well but Bellatrix would probably think he has the right to spy on whomever he pleases.

Ugh, I wish sending Harry would have made things better but... who even knows.

What would she have done to you if she'd caught you? ~~Speaking of Slytherins acting like Gryffindors.~~

Ron acts just like this, you know, when there's something he wants to protect me

wait

~~you're~~

you have feelings for Hermione, don't you. ~~No wonder~~ ~~So that's why~~

Does she know?

Well, that's the first time anyone's ever compared me to Weasley, I'm sure.

I wouldn't want anything bad to happen to Hermione. None of us would, would we?

But that doesn't mean I have feelings for her. I don't have them for anyone. There's nothing for her to know.

Of course no one wants anything bad to happen to Hermione. But

well, I'm not going to try to talk you into telling her, I mean even if she liked you back I'd say this week proved conclusively that secret relationships that happen anywhere within the walls of Hogwarts are maybe not the best idea ever.

There's nothing to tell.

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